Well, it's been quite a while since I posted. The Lord's been really good to me lately, teaching me a lot of things, convicting me of some things, and all for the good. We serve the LIVING GOD! Jesus Christ, It was all made through and for him. Happy Thanksgiving. The following text is from my recent FCA devotional on Campus, called "time-outs." I wrote about how God is freeing me from legalism. Hope it finds you well, and you enjoy!

-Zach

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What about the Law?

2 Corinthians 3:17 “Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.”

Legalism: Doing the “right things”, being self-righteous, holding people and self to a imposed and self-created standard. Scripture example: Colossians 2:23: “Such regulations indeed have an appearance of wisdom, with their self-imposed worship, their false humility and their harsh treatment of the body, but they lack any value in restraining sensual indulgence.”

Lately the Lord has really laid on my heart my struggle with legalism. I think a great word to substitute for legalism is religion. You often see the words “it’s not about religion, it’s about a relationship.” That phrase is nowhere to be found in the Bible, but it does make sense in light of what Jesus Christ was all about. In his Gospels, Jesus tells us that he didn’t come to abolish the law, but to fulfill it. Many seemingly “holy” people in the day would not accept Christ, because the doctrine of Grace was just too easy. In a sense, they couldn’t believe all it took to be reconciled to God was to believe on Jesus to be forgiven. They always felt they had to bring something to the table to win God’s favor.

I know for me, legalism crept in very slowly. It started with a pure motive, to honor God in everything I did, but it quickly changed to how “holy” I could get to draw closer to God. I seemed to believe how good I was directly effected how much God would do in my life. Legalism was about me, how good I could be, how much I could do for God, and simply, a direct abuse and distortion of the Gospel. I would find myself putting people around me in a box or rules, putting them through guilt trips and rebuke, expecting them to follow the same rules I had imposed on myself. In the end, I began to break the rules I myself had set, being bound in the same prison I had created; a prison full of self-condemnation and complete slavery.

Praise be to God that the story didn’t end that way! In Galatians 5, Paul writes and says that for freedom Christ set us free, followed by telling them not to again submit to a yoke of slavery. The yoke of slavery is the law. If we are worried about keeping all the rules, then we lose sight of what being a disciple of Jesus Christ is all about. Jesus tells us that the greatest commandments are to love the Lord with all you have and to love others as yourself. He later instructs us that through those two commandments everything else falls into place. (Matthew 22:36-40)

When we truly discover that Grace is a gift from God, totally not conditional on our performance, then it frees us to live under him and rejoice. Another great passage to refer to is Colossians 2:20-23 it reads: “Since you died with Christ to the basic principles of this world, why, as though you still belonged to it, do you submit to its rules “Do not handle! Do not taste! Do not touch!"? These are all destined to perish with use, because they are based on human commands and teachings.”

Paul tells us that these self-imposed rules may appear to be wise, but have no success in battling sin. The one thing that overcomes sin is Love. The only thing that matters is grace working through us in the form of love (Galatians 5:6). The fruit of the grace is described in Galatians 5:22-25: “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.”

The beginning of the Spirit means the end of the law. Live in Grace. Enjoy God’s gift to you through His son, Jesus Christ. If you haven’t experienced this freedom, accept Christ’s sacrifice as a gift right now, by allowing him to be Lord of your life.

"You see, real freedom is not the liberty to do what we want, or even the absence of distress. Real freedom is the deep-seated confidence that God really will provide everything we need. The person who believes this is the freest of all persons on earth, because no matter what situation they find themselves in, they have nothing to fear."- Jon Bloom (www.desiringgod.org) -ZW

Two months to the day

Hey all,

It's been two months since I last posted. So much has happened, but then again, not too much.

I'm no longer a collegiate baseball player, my 4 years are up. So, alas, i'm just a good ole ordinary college student, maybe even a future intramural champion, who knows.

I'll be back in Maryville for the fall for my last round of classes, which are about half joke classes (ex. golf, officiating baseball).

Right now, however, i'm in North Kansas City with Ben and Noah, doing the internship thing downtown. I work at Rensenhouse Electrical Supply. They sell and distribute electrical supplies throughout the greater KC area, and pull in about 40 million a year...yeah.

I recently went to a sales seminar with my bosses and the salesman and found out, my heart is not in sales. I could manage I think, but I really don't want to spend my professional career selling stuff. We have a great product, very high quality and practical, but i'm not sure. It's something I'll have to search out from God.

Lately I've been affirmed that maybe I should do something with fulltime ministry. I don't know, maybe not, but FCA seems to call on my heart quite a bit. I don't feel called to be a pastor, because I haven't felt that calling in my heart, and I know it's a deep calling, and a tough road.

The weather is nice, finally, but I think spring is over and it's straight to summer. I'm looking forward to what all i'm doing this summer.

-Weekly Softball team (yeah, slowpitch)
-Christian Conference June 6-8 in Warrensburg
-Work Conference June 10-12 in Chicago (seeing a cubbies game too)
-Maybe some golf?
-Maybe volunteer with FCA?

But, those are some of the various things I am looking forward to.

Most of all though, i'm just really waiting to see what God has for me. The Lord is really the only thing I have to live for at this point, and really always was. I desire to live out everything I do through Him and to His glory.

I really really really really want some victory in my life over some particular sins. I'm really quite disgusted that i continue to carry these with me. It seems like the more i'm in the word, the more i'm fortified against the enemy (go figure..) But just depending on the day, i'm at different levels of disgust with it. Sometimes my head finds a way to shut off and not protect me from it, but then follows deep disgust and hatred for myself and my weakness. I know that when we are weak then God is strongest in our lives, so I guess i'm doing well at that.

I really struggle with the fact I try to minister to people and show the gospel through my lifestyle and then have these private sins that hardly anyone know about. I feel very Pharisee-like in that.

I truly take heed to the Lord and realize he is very serious about sin. I'm ready to throw down on it, so I guess that is my next step.

I live on a steady diet these days of John Piper and Paul Washer.

That's life for me right now, a little restricted on content, but the basics.

-I hope this post somehow brings Glory to the one who sent his Son to die for me. It's all about you Jesus.

I am so thankful for the Resurrection of Jesus Christ, leaving the world not in anguish, or hopeless, or lost, but with the full knowledge of who we are and what our destiny is....Praise be to God for His Son and His Word!

I have been listening, if you have followed my notes, to Paul Washer. He is a fire and brimstone type Baptist preacher, at least in the messages I've listened to, who are aimed at a church in Muscle Shoals, Alabama. He contends that it is harder to be a Christian in Alabama than in Russia and North Korea, because at least in those countries you know where people stand.

I for one have been in tears more than once thinking about some people I know that I fear have not been born again, but only conformed to "church behavior." John 3:3 In reply Jesus declared, "I tell you the truth, no one can see the kingdom of God unless he is born again. "

People may say they profess Christ academically in their mind, but God has not done his work in them, because there is no real strong evidence they have passed from death unto life. Others will say that their hearts tell them it's true, but the Bible says the heart is deceptive in Jeremiah. You are not saved because you said a prayer half heartedly, you aren't saved because you went forward in church or filled out a card. You aren't saved because you were baptized. We are saved by grace by faith in Christ...not by good works.

What exactly do I mean? Well, to be Born again, means that you have received Jesus Christ as your personal savior, meaning that the Holy Spirit has convicted you of your sins, leading you to repent (both confess and turn away form your sins).

The Holy Spirit is the third part of the Trinity (the others being the father and the son). The Holy Spirit is the helper that Jesus promised to leave behind when he left. He empowers us to do his will, and make disciples. When we are born again, we receive the Holy Spirit, literally. The Holy Spirit, or Ghost, is a literal being.

It seems that Jesus is very adimate that we know the truth concerning following him. One of the most scary passages in the Bible is Matthew 7:13-14 13"Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. 14But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.

Jesus Says only a few find the narrow gate, which is of course, belief in Him. He also adds narrow is the road that leads to life.Right after that passage Jesus goes on to show who false prophets are and says you will know them by their fruit. What kind of fruit do we have? Jesus says not everyone who says Lord Lord will enter the kingdom of heaven, only he that does his will.

Does this mean that after we are saved we have to keep all the commandments and be perfect? No, because that is impossible. But, we will know his will when we are born again, at which time the Holy Spirit enters us. Ephesians 4:30 And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you WERE SEALED FOR THE DAY OF REDEMPTION. (once we have the spirit, we are sealed!) This also is repeated by Jesus when he says no one will snatch those who are saved out of his hands.

Paul knows that many believe they are saved but are deceived, as he writes in 2 Corinthians 13:5 "Examine yourselves to see whether you are in the faith; test yourselves. Do you not realize that Christ Jesus is in you—unless, of course, you fail the test?" He tells us to test ourselves!!! In John's first epistle, he goes in length of part of that test....1 John 5:13 "13I write these things to you who believe in the name of the Son of God so that you may know that you have eternal life."

Among the tests in the book, which I suggest you read personally if led, says those that do not love his brothers does not hold the truth, those who say they have no sin, those who do not say Jesus was 100 percent flesh and 100 percent God don't have the truth. A statement that is very convicting is 1 John 3:7 Dear children, do not let anyone lead you astray. He who does what is right is righteous, just as he is righteous. 8He who does what is sinful is of the devil, because the devil has been sinning from the beginning. The reason the Son of God appeared was to destroy the devil's work. 9No one who is born of God will continue to sin, because God's seed remains in him; he cannot go on sinning, because he has been born of God.

Now, does this mean we are going to be perfect, NO. But if we continue in sin and do not abandon it through conviction of the Holy Spirit the truth is not in us. Yes, we have freedom, through the Spirit.

1 John 1:8 If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. 9If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.

OK, this has been long...thanks for sticking in....

1 John 1. 6If we claim to have fellowship with him yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live by the truth. 7But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all[b] sin.I wont quote 1 John anymore, but know this... Jesus can, and will forgive us, if we genuinely wish to follow Him.

Personally, i'm not so sure that I haven't recently been saved...seriously. I lived so long going for personal gain, in vain. What good is it that I gain the whole world and lose my soul? NONE! I know one thing for sure...sin has a different meaning in my life. Paul Washer states in his sermons that when people say they have a new relationship with God, he asks them if they have a new relationship with sin. Are you free of sin? Do you hate sin?

I just hope you took the time to read this, and then were either convicted of sin, or reaffirmed of your faith. I suggest if you are battling with this, read up some more on it. Here are some links that have helped me battle with these tough scriptures....

Paul Washer's sermons on salvation (also try youtubing "Paul Washer")http://www.heartcrymissionary.com/resources/sermons/paul_washer#biblical_assurance_series

John Piper's thoughts

http://www.desiringgod.org/ResourceLibrary/Sermons/ByDate/1985/487_If_Our_Hearts_Do_Not_Condemn_Us_We_Have_Confidence_Before_God

If any of you have any personal questions, please let me know! I love you all, which is why I write these things. It is time to become Kingdom people! Jesus LIVES! He is faithful to forgive you! Live for Him, it's all thats worth living for. God Bless You all!

I have been in some up and downs lately, and in the end, I know that God will be glorified.

Yesterday really sucked, because I was pitching in practice, hoping to turn some heads and get some attention from coach that I could get some more innings. Not the results i was looking for. I threw an inside pitch to our starting catcher and he was bunting. He just barely tipped the ball, probably traveling between 82-84 mph, and it went into his mouth, knocking out a tooth, and distributing all of the other ones all over his mouth. It was awful. After that I just gave up hit after hit, so it is very possible I pitched my last game as a Bearcat. I will still be waiting for an opportunity, but I wouldn't pitch me if the game was anywhere close to on the line. Ugh.

I will find a way to Praise God through this, but it's tough.

Spiritually, i've been awakened to the power and presence of the Holy Spirit. I was raised in a conservative denomination, and we never really talked about gifts of the Holy Spirit. I have recently listened a lot to Calvary Chapel radio, good ole KRSS Tarkio, and also a new church plant in town. It has been really good and good to build up my faith.

I have also just really become completely abandoned from what I used to want. I know that it's worth nothing. The American dream, the collaboration of stuff, just isn't worth it. God is great though, and I'm so so so so thankful for Jesus's sacrifice on the cross. Grace is so beautiful.

I have been listening to some fire and brimstone Baptist preaching which has convicted and inspired me. If you have some time on your hands, here is the link.

http://www.heartcrymissionary.com/resources/sermons/paul_washer

As you can read, it's Paul Washer, who is kind of notorious for being a hard preacher, but I think his message is something we can learn from. So, I hope maybe it blesses you. I would suggest "examine yourself" or "the narrow way" but they are all good. Very very conservative messages, but good.

God continues to prune me for his service, and it's painful, but in the long run, i'm sure it will be better for me.

God is Love

The world.

Sometimes, i truly want to just take a leak on the world. It's not my home. It is full of pain, death, and sin. We are told in the Bible that we are not to love the world. This is one of the few standards I can live up to right now.I cannot wait for the day I wake up, and I sleep no more. I feel no more pain. I sin no more. I am made perfect. I have nothing to do all day but praise God and His son. I cannot wait to see his face, and cry tears of joy and just yell a mighty yell, and maybe even give a fist pump.

Times like these are good, because they bring us back to the one who is worthy. Nothing in the world matters to me as much as God. Other people matter to me, because they are what God loves.

In general though, there are many days, where I feel like I would do God more service just staying in bed, instead of injecting the world with my arrogant, prideful thoughts and motives. Maybe if I slept throughout the day I wouldn't sin either.

Dude, I just take strength and comfort in the fact that God holds the world in his hands. There is nothing I can do to mess God up, he is going to beat Satan, and he doesn't need my help. He wins, it's been settled. No matter how many times I screw up, he will forgive me. Even when I run, he is still right there, chasing after me. He doesn't give up either. I am a screw up. I always will be, but that doesn't have to be the end of me. I just wish I was a little more appreciative of the gift of grace. How so? In the way that I would live more so as the living sacrifice that he wants us to be.

Who gives a flying flip if the Cardinals win the World Series? Who cares if KU doesn't lose another game. Who cares if I earn a degree, or make a salary. Who needs it. Who needs stuff. The only thing stuff does is distract us from Him. If I grew up overseas, there is a good chance, i would know what it feels like to be truly persecuted.

I'm pissed at myself. Pure and simple. It's not one thing that brings me to this point, just a collection of rotten things.And, I don't care if you don't believe, but Satan is real. He is a constant adversary, and he's out to get you. However, he doesn't win in the end, and he doesn't have to win now. But, nevertheless, he is real. There is a war out there we cannot see. You may think i'm a looney toon if you don't read this in the right context, but that's ok.

That's it, I don't have some awesome revolutionary revelation. Who needs more of my thoughts and what my mind thinks. I want what He wants. I want to know what his Spirit wants. I want to live my life knowing that.

Valley of Sorrow to River of JOY!

I think it is really important to note the rejoicing I have found after such a hard few weeks. God has made some things very apparent to me, and they all came at perfect times. I will humbly say that another attack may be headed my way, but I still need to set the record straight.

Over the past week, I have sought God as hard as I could and have found him for sure. I heard an excellent message at one of the campus ministries. Romans 8:38-40 is what I heard, which is what is written at the bottom of my blog. Nothing can separate us from the Love of Jesus Christ.

Then, i was searching out fruits of the spirit, to for sure know I'm his,and I found what to me, is like a fresh, new realm of spirituality. Those gifts that are never talked about in Baptist church, but scripturally have no reason to believe they don't occur anymore. Friends have been telling me that they have witnessed the Holy Spirit do supernatural things. Tongues, healing, interpretation, and God keeps sending these people to me when I have questions. It has been so refreshing.

Paul even instructs us to seek these gifts. That could be why we dont' see these gifts in the Baptist Church, because they don't believe they still occur since the forming of the Bible. Which they relate to 1 Corinthians 13. Not so though.

Either way, i have just been digging deep (and if you are curious, root through the word! 1 Corinthians 12-14 is where a lot of it goes down) and of course, the book of Acts.

I have once again, that peace that resides in the heart of God's children. I am loving it, not life on earth, but being in God's hands. I will continue to seek God diligently and wait on him to work on me and work through me the way he desires. I desire to live in God's will. Finally! Praise the Lord for the Valley of Sorrow to the River of JOY!!!!

I also jammed out this week, a life song to me is "East to the West" by Casting Crowns. What a great song! Have a great week, and seek First His Kingdom!

Dark

So, i'm in this, and have been in a while.

This pit of deep darkness in my mind. I cannot get happy. I cannot feel set free by Christ. I cannot just let go and let God.

I have been on my knees day and night pleading and petitioning God to free me from these dark thoughts. I know that I am nothing on my own, and that I need God more than ever right now. It is such an ugly place, and I don't know how I got here. I remember just weeks ago when I would rejoice in God's creation and splendor, and the victories he'd give me in classes, the baseball field, and just overall.

He has provided so much for me, i have the "charmed life" that most dream of. Yet, i feel so destitute. In my life, in the past 3 years, i have prayed "the prayer" probably 100 times. Usually I get spiritual renewal, but right now, I feel so captive. What does this mean? What should I do? Where should I go?

I want to be used by Christ, to be sold out completely. I am definitely no longer subject to any other thing on this earth. Christ is life. God is good. He is also righteous and just. He is also loving and forgiving.

Was the period of time I was happy before this in coorelation to being oblivious to the people everyday who needed God around me? Was it just pure selfish ambition? I think that definitely has to play a role.

I just feel so alone inside, not on the outside. I have had so many friends talk, pray, and encourage me along the way.

I guess for so long I trusted Christ, yet didn't rely completely on him. Man, if it is one thing that I have gotten out of this deal, it is reliance upon God. I can't be saved by any man, anything a man has said, only God and his Holy Word and Spirit. There is nothing any of us can do to inherit the Kingdom of God, only what God does for us.

I want to bear good fruit only, and further His Kingdom. I'm so sick and tired of myself. I don't want myself anymore. I truly know now what it means to not be friends with this world. I think for the longest time, I was friends with the world. No longer.

"I need you Jesus, to come to my rescue,
Where else can I go?
There's no other name by which I am saved!
Capture me with your Grace, I will follow You!

This world has nothing for me, it can offer me nothing that lasts, nothing but what withers and fades. It only offers me disappointment and hardship.

With God all things are possible, it's time to put all my trust in Him!

Pray for me, pray for all of those who don't know Him! Right now, not later!

Intro

Hey there friends and fellow people.

I haven't blogged in a long time, but I'm looking to get back into it. I'll hopefully get this online and cracking in time for baseball season. God Bless...